Monday, May 25, 2009

Going Public

There's something about going public with news that makes it seem real. I mean, if no one knows, then it may not really be happening. But it is. And now it's public. And it's really real.

We are moving.

Actually it isn't that easy. The words bring churning to my stomach, and a little bit of wet to my eyes (to quote Junie B.). I am not a bit fan of change. But I know when I must obey a calling.

I have actually known it was coming for years now. I knew that Ryan was not called to be a worship minister forever. Or at least not in the music ministry capacity. But I am one to ignore, or maybe just put off worry, until the time is imminent.

There was the usual discussion of dreams of the future on the trip back from Christmas with the family. But road trips do that to my husband, so I didn't worry. But this time he didn't unload these thoughts from his head when he unloaded the bags from the car. I could tell this time was different.

By mid-January, I was in full worry mode. Crying. Lots of crying. "What will the kids think? I am going to miss my two-headed shower. We have the best story-time lady 2 miles from our house. How can I leave all the people I love here? Were we ever really meant to be here? Oh, the humidity! My kids will have to learn to shut the door. What product will I use to keep the frizzies out of my hair? I love my grocery store. We have never gotten the house done where we wanted it. *groan* How will we ever get the house ready to go on the market? Man, I will miss the zoo. And Explora. Have I been holding my husband back because I don't like change? Reed will be so sad when he realizes he can't just go balloon chasing with Daddy on any early-October morning. How will we tell north from south again without the mountains in the east? The kids will really miss children's choir. (And so will I!) Are we really being called away? Didn't I just feel this way about leaving Arkansas? Why do I feel like I'm just getting settled here, getting to LOVE IT here, and it's time to go already?"

In late February, I came to a resolve: My husband has been given gifts to do explosive ministry to lost people in a hurting world. I wanted to see him set free to do great things for the Kingdom!! And I was willing to go anywhere to see that!

So, for a time, I was able to set the worry aside and be excited about the potential! I have even quit nay-saying. (I have always contended that was my job in our relationship!) One of my new answers is, "Yes, it's crazy, but I believe you would be the one who could do it!" Potential is a great place to live!

But now. Now it is public. Now it is real. Now it is imminent.

We are moving.

I am excited. I am sad. I am going.


Kari said...

I am praying for you and your family as you start down the road to new adventure. To me that word best describes all the ups and downs ahead of you.

As I was reading my Bible this morning I ran across a scripture and thought of you and your family.

Psalm 119:54 "Your decrees have been my theme songs wherever I have lived."

Love you all!

Lynda Eubanks said...

We are praying for you and what the future holds for your ministry. God is a great God and if you will just surrender to Him, He will take you on the adventure of your life! Let us know if we can help in any way.


Anonymous said...

I love you aunt Sara. Thank you for being such an incredible role model for me. You are an amazing support for your I hope to be too. I will continue to pray. God's dreams and plans for our lives are always so much more amazing than our own. I can't wait to read more.

Anonymous said...

Oh that comment above is from Mindy. Love you!!

Jess said...

Isn't it amazing that even the little things, like leaving the door open or your shower head, can be the things that we fixate on and allow to keep us from trying new and exciting things? I am so glad that you have gone public with the news, and I am so glad that you are able to see the potential in the situation, scary as it may be. I love you both and can't wait to see where this little path will lead! :)

Shelly said...

I think you should move back to Arkansas so I can have a Bible Study partner again.

I'm just sayin.........

LOVE YOU GUYS and PRAYING HARD for wherever God is leading you.

Simply Organized said...

The moon will be the same wherever you go! Something about that always helps me. I love knowing that my loved ones look up and see the same thing I do.